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Celebrating My Dad's Life

11/10/2015

17 Comments

 
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Last weekend I wrote a very personal blog about my Dad's declining health. The comments in support of what I've been feeling at seeing him slowly leave us have been amazing, but even more important, healing. Well, last night Dad went home to God, and this is my third attempt at trying to write something beyond sadness.

​While I can't deny a huge sense of loss, this is a time when I want to celebrate Dad's life, which after 93 years was the kind of life we all hope to look back on in our final hours. Dad and Mom were married for two weeks short of 66 years when she lost the battle to Alzheimer's.  I remember Dad leaning over her, just before her last breath and saying, "We had an incredible run. I love you."

There it is, the essence of my Dad - just a guy who loved his family and friends more than anything else. In fact, nothing else really mattered to him, and that brings me full circle to still trying to figure out what to share here. You see, there aren't many guys my age who still had their parents around, let alone enjoyed being with them. I had them both these last few years living in Florida. Even yesterday, just hours before Dad let go, when I whispered in his ear, "You'll always be my best buddy," he squeezed my hand recognizing my presence.

Just to keep imaging in today's post, my Dad absolutely loved photography. Hasselblad's legendary Ernst Wildi once told me the difference between a professional photographer and an amateur is that amateurs show you all of their shots! Well, through thousands of Kodachrome and then Ektachrome images Dad never threw a single slide away. He later got into prints and eventually digital, but his biggest challenge was trying to find a camera for my mother that didn't cut off heads. My mother could never frame a shot, and it sent Dad off in search of the one camera that wasn't "defective". 

He loved coming to conventions with me and especially when he and Don Blair could hang out together. While he was in awe of Don's ability to capture/create a stunning portrait, the friendship between them was more about their mutual love for their families, because that was the standard for both of them. 

My Dad was simply the epitome of a great "Pop" and the stories I have, many supported with photographs over the years, will last me the rest of my life. Behind every tear is a bitter-sweet smile - I'm going to miss him a lot, but what a gift he gave our family and me. I couldn't be prouder to be Ralph Cohen's son.

Those we love don't go away. They walk beside us every day, unseen, unheard, but always near...
​still loved, still missed and very dear.
Anonymous
So Pop, thanks for a lifetime of smiles, support and simply being my best pal. You never gave up on me. You never stopped being supportive. While it might have been your heart that finally gave out, maybe it was because you gave so much of it to all of us. Sure do love ya!
17 Comments
Matt
11/10/2015 07:58:59 am

Very sorry to read this Skip, I know how much your Dad means to you.

Reply
Brian link
11/10/2015 08:15:29 am

Thank you for sharing Ralph with us for all these years,though I never met your dad, I felt I knew him. I'm glad his suffering in the end was brief and that he was surrounded by all those that he loved.

Reply
Bobbi Lane
11/10/2015 09:27:48 am

Skip, my deepest condolences for your deep loss. I never met your Dad, but I know how wonderful he is, because his essence lives on in you. Sending you love, sympathy and hugs.

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Michelle
11/10/2015 09:45:19 am

Skip, may all the wonderful memories of your father bring you comfort. He has left a mark on many and will live on through you. I'm sure he is dancing right now and taking more glorious images with your mother. My thoughts are with you and your family. What a life to celebrate!!

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Peter
11/10/2015 09:57:48 am

Skip, I just wanted to say I understand your loss, and I feel for you even though I've never had the chance to meet you. Stay strong, and I'm grateful you wrote these posts, it helps a guy who lost his father too young.

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Jared M. Burns link
11/10/2015 11:39:15 am

Skip, I have read your words often about your father and wish I had been able to meet him. There is no doubt he was a great man and a huge influence in your life. I am sorry for your loss and our prayers are with you and your family!

Reply
Brent Watkins
11/10/2015 11:56:18 am

Hey buddy,

I'm so sorry for your loss. Try to take comfort in he and your mom being together again, and a lifetime of fabulous memories. We are here if you need us. Take time.

Reply
Scott Stuart
11/10/2015 01:03:41 pm

So sorry to hear about your dad. I wish I'd had a chance to meet him. I haven't had that kind of relationship with my dad. And, now it seems he's showing signs of Alzheimer's himself and doesn't recognize me often. Sorry you lost your best buddy.

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Kathy owen link
11/10/2015 02:39:47 pm

I lost my father this year . Beautiful words . My father was 83 . So very sorry .

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Nicole link
11/10/2015 02:55:23 pm

I just found your blog and read your beautiful heartfelt post about your dad. I just wanted to say I am sorry for you loss! The camera search for your mom made me giggle!

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RON DIESSLIN link
11/10/2015 06:02:29 pm

Skip, I'm so sorry for your loss, and happy for your lifetime of wonderful memories. I may be facing this soon with my father. You are in our prayers. God Bless.

Reply
Elena Hernandez link
11/11/2015 07:35:51 am

Skip.
I agree you were blessed to have him and your mom as long as you did and what an amazing man he was!
An example of living life to the fullest with the priorities being passed down to his children. Simply put his legacy was LOVE.
God bless you and your family during this time of sorrow and may he give you Peace...
Love you!
Elena

Reply
Eric H Wojtkun link
11/11/2015 10:55:12 am

Skip I saw this just before my family went to church for veteran's day. I prayed for your father Ralph and your family as you go forward. I prayed for the repose of his soul, and reunification with your beloved mother and God in heaven. I'll keep you all in my nightly prayer book of intentions as well. God Bless...Eric

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Rich Fuller
11/11/2015 12:25:23 pm

Best eulogy ever!!
Thinking about you roomy!

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JM (Joe) Elario link
11/13/2015 08:31:59 pm

. . best buddy . . . yep.

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Aurora
11/13/2015 09:13:42 pm

Skip rhatbwas beautiful cheers to your dad Ana making the most of everyday ❤️

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Brian Palmer
11/14/2015 12:25:55 am

Skip,
Perla, Sara and I are very sorry to hear of your dad passing. I know it meant the world to him to have Shelia and you with him Florida. I know your 'Best Buddy' is so incredibly proud of you Skip.

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