Missing Mom on Mother's Day

by Skip Cohen

Unlike most Sunday morning posts, I knew exactly what I wanted to write about this morning. It's Mother's Day, and especially with both my parents having passed, I tend to think beyond not only "Mom" but my folks. As I've gotten older, my most cherished memories come with old photographs. For my mom, and dad too, their story was captured in a day-in-the-life album thanks to Cantrell Portrait Design and Graphi Studio.

The album contains only 14 photographs, printed full-page and often without a border. The book is proof that less is more!  It captures the love they shared. The cover shot is simply a full-page bleed black and white and is proof that a picture really is worth a thousand words.

But today's post isn't just about my folks; it's about the mistake we all make in thinking we have unlimited time with the people we love the most. Looking back, especially on Mother's Day, I regret not getting closer to my Mom before Alzheimer's robbed us of so many years and better memories. She fought the battle for eight years, and Dad never left her side.

---

“Call your mother. Tell her you love her.
Remember, you’re the only person who knows what her heart sounds like from the inside.”
Rachel Wolchin

I might be an old fart, but that doesn't change the fact that I'm missing my folks and Mom this Mother's Day. But thanks to photographs, there are no tears, just deep smiles and memories of the good times, the crazy times, and even the sad moments of letting go.

When Mom passed, we were all around her bed. My Dad whispered in her ear, "What a great run we had!"  Sheila said, "Mom, it's okay to let go and be with God." One tear rolled down Mom's cheek, she let out a  sigh, and let go. It had been raining, and at the same time a rainbow appeared. Seriously, no embellishment- It was a Hollywood moment.

So for those of you who, like me, and have lost your mother, I'm a fan of Marianne Williamson, who talks a lot about death. I've never been particularly spiritual, but that's where Sheila comes in.  I know the only thing that's changed is that Mom's left her physical being, but her spirit is alive and well and all around us. Hang on to only the good memories you have of your mother and cherish every smile they give you.

To all of you celebrating with your mothers today... enjoy each minute with the same focus you'd have when when savoring a fine wine. Don't waste a minute on anything that doesn't matter. Take those walks down Memory Lane and get a few grab-shots and video to cherish years from now.

And to all of you Moms out there, thank you for the path you chose. We're all here thanks to your journey and the sacrifices you make every day as a mother.

Wishing everyone a terrific Sunday. This is definitely a day to go for those eleven-second therapeutic hugs I always write about, especially if you're going to be with your mother today. And if you're like me, and Mom has long since passed, she's still watching over you - send her that hug anyway.

Happy Sunday...and Mother's Day!

---

“Successful mothers are not the ones that have never struggled.
They are the ones that never give up, despite the struggles.”
Sharon Jaynes

...