Kay Has Left the Building...But NOT Our Hearts

To live in hearts we leave behind is not to die.
Carl Sagan

by Skip Cohen

​Sunday Morning Reflections is never about business and marketing. I usually never know what I want to write until I sit at the computer, but this morning is different. I knew when I tried to write something about losing Kay Eskridge a few days ago, today would be the day. Last week, I couldn't find the words.

Like so many of us in the industry, I'm trying to understand Kay's passing. There have been thousands of comments from artists all over the world about the news. The common theme is sadness combined with bittersweet memories of time with her—in short; she was a powerhouse of passion, enthusiasm, and pride in being a photographer.

The Google dictionary defines "love" as an intense feeling of deep affection. Along with thousands of people whose lives she touched, we all loved her. She lit up the room wherever she was. For me one of the things I loved most about her, was her honesty about her life. She hid nothing.

In 2020 and again in 2021, Chamira Young and I hosted Kay on the "Mind Your Own Business" podcast. Both podcasts are below. As I thought about sharing these today, I hesitated. For some it might seem too early, but when I started listening, the memories of working with Kay over the years made me smile. 

She was so dynamic and open about ways to help other artists build a stronger business. She was also completely open about the demons she'd battled with over the years. In fact, after we were off the air on one of the podcasts, Kay let me know she'd love to do a podcast on sobriety and her journey—she wanted to find more ways to help more people.

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​I know everyone has their own memories/stories about Kay, but for me, it was non-stop trash-talk after she outbid me at a PPA Charities fundraiser for an Arnold Palmer autographed putter. It was around 2000, and she had the high bid, fair and square - but the fun of trying to beat her up was the same every time we talked. She had this laugh and twinkle whenever she reminded me that the putter was hung over her fireplace, NOT mine!

I just read over what I've written, and I'm having such a hard time expressing the hole in my heart...there's even a little regret for not keeping in better contact with her. We all take so much for granted, which was the thing about my friendship with Kay. I had never thought about a time when she wouldn't be around. In fact, looking back on my career, I don't remember a time when she wasn't around or even when or how we first met... and I'm betting I'm not alone.

One of my favorite quotes used many times over the years, is "I am a part of all that I have met" by Alfred Lord Tennyson. We're all unique because of the people who have come into our lives. Kay touched all of our lives, making her one of the common denominators we share. While technically, her life is over, her light will continue to shine because of the energy we share with her memory.

‘What we have done for ourselves alone dies with us;
what we have done for others and the world remains and is immortal.’
Albert Pike