Brothers, Butterflies and a Peaceful Sunday Morning

by Skip Cohen

As we added more plants to our butterfly garden yesterday, I knew exactly what I wanted to share this morning. Remember, on Sundays, I always jump the tracks and wander miles away from business and marketing topics. It's my time to get a little more personal.

We've all had to deal with loss; whether it's family or friends, it's all part of life. Twenty-eight years ago, my wife lost two brothers in a car accident. Thirty days later, she lost another brother in a road rage incident in Chandler, Arizona. When we built the butterfly garden eight years ago, three monoliths were added to the water feature. It occurred to me that it was a perfect memorial to her three brothers. They were all killed before I came into the family, but that doesn't change feeling like I knew and loved them, thanks to Sheila's stories.

Almost three years ago, she lost another brother, and last fall, "Uncle" Randy, her last living brother, died of a brain aneurysm. She went off in search of a fitting addition to the garden and found it at Toscano, a sculpture manufacturer. Adding the two boys completed the garden, but nature had one more surprise for us. 

That's "Randy" lying down in the back. For the last two weeks, we've had monarch butterflies throughout the backyard, all attracted to the Stuckeys-like big buffet of a few dozen milkweed plants. While the caterpillars continue to feast, it's a never-ending cycle of finding a new chrysalis almost every day. Last night, Sheila spotted a new one hanging from "Randy's" ear.

The garden isn't as lush as it will be in a few more weeks, but it's lush with memories, love, and peace. I found an appropriate plaque online that says it all:

Those we love don't go away. They walk beside us every day.
​Unseen, unheard, but always near, still loved, still missed, and always dear.

Having a garden like this has become a true labor of love for both of us. It's far more than just about butterflies; it's about turning the challenges of life we both share into something filled with color and beauty. And while the only brother-in-law I ever knew was Randy, it doesn't change my love for the energy of their spirits, thanks to photographs and Sheila's stories. As each new flower blooms, it's another visual tribute.

Wishing everybody a Happy Easter and a day filled with peace, love and new memories to add to your stash to cherish in the future. It's a day for those eleven-second therapeutic hugs I always write about, and in the process of a long hug, think about how much richer your life is thanks to the person you've got your arms around!

Happy Sunday...or Monday on the other side of the world.

Butterflies are nature’s angels. They remind us what a gift it is to be alive.
Robyn Nola